Well before I speak my piece (peace?) here, I want to commend Hansel for still posting. I get it, no one reads this but us, but fuckin' a do I enjoy it. So thanks Hansel, you make everyday a little brighter with that big smile, beautiful blonde hair and your rapist's wit.
Thank you
Tom, Charlie...where are you guys? I feel like a boyfriend at the end of a relationship that I know is over but I keep fighting to make it work. Am I holding onto strings much better left to fray here? Tom, I miss your gifs and blunt force sexism and bigotry. How do I go on without it? Charlie, I miss the rhetoric and insightful, yet degenerative advice that you provide. How do I go on without it? Tell me how?
I sit here, alone, drinking a Bud Light because that's what single 26 year olds do. We drink alone. I haven't had a girlfriend in two years now and I'm more comfortable with the fact that no one loves me and that I will die alone than I am with the fact that this blog looks like it's dying for a 2nd time. I'm not a vet but blogs aren't cats. They don't have 9 lives. They have an undefined amount of lives because they're digital and they don't actually live, per se. But that's besides the fact. The fact of the matter is I miss you guys. Make me feel again. Make me alive.
Also, rest in peace to those camo boxers. Oh, to have spent that much time close to your buttsack; what I would give. I envy the life that they had. RIP Camo Mammie Jammies, I think we all owe them a moment of silence. -DSA
Showing posts with label bud light. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bud light. Show all posts
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Sunday, August 11, 2013
Pardon the Format
This post is appropriately named 'Pardon the Format' as I am posting this from my phone...at a bar...alone. So naturally my grammer a puncshuashun may be a bit off; please forgive. As I type this some clown plays Kings of Leon on the jukebox. Easy there fella, this isn't the type of sensitive music that gets you laid. Ugh, some people's kids. And yes I'm at a bar alone. But only because this goddamn grilled cheese is from places unknown. If gold had a taste, it'd be the grilled cheese. I'm probably going to get balls deep in this Bud Light, but only because 'just the tip' never stops at just the tip. Next thing you know your ballsack is violently slapping her anus and both parties are sweating.
I have no direction for this post, just that sometimes the moons align with the Jupiters and you gotta follow that gut instinct. Is it good for you? Probably not but those flutters for drunken gluttony state a fact that simply cannot be argued. So stand up, salute and be proud. After all, you're all from one of the original 13 colonies in a universe that knows no border. If you want your mind blown talk to Cobain, if you want enlightened there is a light switch for that shit. You guys got this. Also, the license plate 'CerelKilr' will get you nowhere but incarcerated. Be above it. Many people ask that you take the high road so that they have more room on the low road. But fuck it, you aren't in traffic...you ARE traffic. Don't ever forget where you were.
You sometimes might wonder how you got here or where you're going but in the grand scheme of things, since when did such nonsense matter? You've been given a gift that trillions have been denied by bed sheets and stomach linings but yet you choose to sit around and contemplate if the knife goes across or down the road. Buck up or shut up John Doe. If you see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's either freedom or a train coming your way. You gonna run to it or from it? They say the early bird gets the worm, but don't ever forget that the second mouse gets the cheese. It's paradoxical to think that we'll never know until we open the box but can't assume until we do, just ask Schrodinger's cat. But hey, this is the type of shit you have to seek out. Flight or fight. I know it's backwards but I refuse to be submissive before aggressive. You want a knight in shining armor? Have him. To me, that means his meddle has never been tested. Is that who you really want standing in your corner, down in the trenches or changing your diaper? I didn't think so. Find me someone with a real heart and I'll ask you to stop killing people and exposing their innards. Psycho.
Anyways, back to my original thought, college football starts in under 3 weeks and my face can't wait.
-DSA
I have no direction for this post, just that sometimes the moons align with the Jupiters and you gotta follow that gut instinct. Is it good for you? Probably not but those flutters for drunken gluttony state a fact that simply cannot be argued. So stand up, salute and be proud. After all, you're all from one of the original 13 colonies in a universe that knows no border. If you want your mind blown talk to Cobain, if you want enlightened there is a light switch for that shit. You guys got this. Also, the license plate 'CerelKilr' will get you nowhere but incarcerated. Be above it. Many people ask that you take the high road so that they have more room on the low road. But fuck it, you aren't in traffic...you ARE traffic. Don't ever forget where you were.
You sometimes might wonder how you got here or where you're going but in the grand scheme of things, since when did such nonsense matter? You've been given a gift that trillions have been denied by bed sheets and stomach linings but yet you choose to sit around and contemplate if the knife goes across or down the road. Buck up or shut up John Doe. If you see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's either freedom or a train coming your way. You gonna run to it or from it? They say the early bird gets the worm, but don't ever forget that the second mouse gets the cheese. It's paradoxical to think that we'll never know until we open the box but can't assume until we do, just ask Schrodinger's cat. But hey, this is the type of shit you have to seek out. Flight or fight. I know it's backwards but I refuse to be submissive before aggressive. You want a knight in shining armor? Have him. To me, that means his meddle has never been tested. Is that who you really want standing in your corner, down in the trenches or changing your diaper? I didn't think so. Find me someone with a real heart and I'll ask you to stop killing people and exposing their innards. Psycho.
Anyways, back to my original thought, college football starts in under 3 weeks and my face can't wait.
-DSA
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